Greetings from Austin Street

Happy Monday!  All is well here at 811.  Day 3 checked off and 31 to go.

Dear God, I want to know you more each day and to trust you in all of the events in my life. Help me to be vulnerable so that I can experience you fully in all of the situations in my life.  I am not asking for suffering I just want to remember to see you and trust in your loving presence in all of my ways and all of my days.  Only the deepest longings of my heart can be filled by you. When I read scripture I learn about you, but Lord, when I pray I come to know you. I love you Lord and thanks for remaining with me. In Jesus name, amen.

Last Thursday I was prepped to receive radiation. I was not emotionally prepared for what was about to happen. I was not prepared for the feeling of extraordinary vulnerability I felt during that hour flat on my back with my arms up and behind my head and with strict orders not to move except to breathe. My arms had begun to cramp, my back was cramping and my fingers had long since gone numb. The pain was very intense and increasing with each moment. Sometime during that hour of prayer I prayed to just see the face of Jesus. (Be careful for what you pray.)  This is the image I received. It was the image of Jesus on the cross with His arms stretched out on that cross piece and the look of agony on his face was almost unbearable. At my most vulnerable I saw Jesus at His most vulnerable. I thought of His anguish far greater than mine. Here’s the thing…Jesus shared that He understood my pain and vulnerability through His own pain and vulnerability. God, in the image I was given, wanted me to live in total trust and in the suffering of Christ how very real Christ really is. Jesus remained with me sharing a very personal moment and I came to understand and know my Lord and Savior more. Perhaps it is when we allow ourselves to be vulnerable that we experience Him fully and just maybe as Jesus and I shared this holy time and intimate moment I think I experienced joy in the living presence of God.

“I admit I once lived by rumors of you; now I have it all firsthand—from my own eyes and ears!

Job 42: 5

“I will see him for myself, and I long for that moment.”

Job 19: 27

Take joy in the journey praying to know Christ more. Wear comfortable shoes, get some sleep and think pink!  Love you all, Bruce and Gaylene